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FEATURES Jul 8 2013 7:16PM
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Why Fathers Have the Right to Give Their Sons Jacked-Up Haircuts

by Lawrence “LAW” Watfordhttp://www.facebook.com/mansitioning                                                                              www.mansitioning.com

So Father’s Day has passed, but as a father of two boys and a TM.com writer I feel obligated to explain to all you moms, and warn you expectant mothers that your husband (or baby’s daddy) WILL, without question, live out his childhood dream of being a barber on your son’s hair.  I know this because I’ve been there and because I’m taking my wife through it now.

I can’t explain it, but as soon as you pop him out and the doctor says, “it’s a boy!” we’re already looking at his bald little head, counting down the days until we can take some Wahl clippers to his head. Of course, as a mom you’ll more than likely protest, but trust me, as soon as you hit the club with your girlfriends for that “break” you needed, your husband is gearing up to vandalize your baby boy's hairline.  Sometimes, dad’s creativity may even result in a totally new hairstyle. 

You ever hear of the “Slumby”?  Yeah, that’s what you get when your haircut splits the difference between a Slope and a Gumby… Guess who was the brilliant non-barber that invented that - Leonard Watford – my dad (a man, btw who shines in most every regard other than barbering).   But it must be a generational curse, because I too have been saving hundreds of dollars a year by jackin-up my boys’ heads.  The only difference between my dad and me is that my mom never stepped in to protect our hair, whereas I often find myself at odds with my wife who keeps threatening to take my boys away from me and to a “real” barber. 


Looking back, I laugh at it now, understanding that I, like my dad, have the absolute best of intentions, but unfortunately those good intentions could never take the place of barber’s license.  The thing for you, as a mother to keep in mind is that your son’s haircut disaster is actually a good thing - a really good thing.  You see, I didn’t quite realize it when I was the victim of my dad’s barber fantasy, but showing up to class with a jacked-up fade, or the infamous “soup-bowl” haircut is a rights-of-passage in the life of a boy.  In fact, I’d bet that you could identify the boys with active fathers (or father figures) by how uneven their line-up is, or how wide their part is.  It’s why, to this day, the barbershop still stands as a sacred space where boys learn to socialize like men and men go to fraternize like boys.

Thank you for checking out my column “Mansitioning.”    hope you’ll leave feedback and follow meat www.mansitioning.com, on Facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/mansitioning and on twitter (https://twitter.com/mansitioning). Give me some ideas about what kind of subjects you’d like to hear discussed...

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